Panic Attack

It has been a long, long time since I've had a day where so much as gone wrong. Some of the highlights:

* couldn't find wrapping paper for my grandmother's present...it seems we don't have any

* barely avoided running my car of an embankment on the freeway. Managed to burn my tires pretty good.

* Got to church early to find out class had been canceled, moved to Terry's class to find out that some minor volunteer work of mine was being used as an example of good work sin the church. For those who don't know me, I hate having my work recognized and insist that all my volunteer work go without recgonicitation. I felt very shamed.

* Made a mistake and attended church late service -> and ended up late for my Grandma and Grandpa's birthday.

* couldn't find a networker who was here only for the weekend.

* Got lost trying to get to the birthday party. Got so lost that I was unable to attend the event.

* Got into a public fight with a payphone that ate my change

all this before 1:00 p.m. I'm stressed and I'm getting sloppy. Most of my stress is due to the extra work I've been pulling for KCS and about the delays in my college admission. Some stress is personal. All-in-all I'm faced with a seemingly insurmountable horde of challenges and part of my mind tells me about how easy it would be for me to simply run away from all of it, to shut everything/everyone like I used to. I no longer have that option, though. If I truly wish to be the man God wants me to be, I will have to face these challenges head-on. I will face these challenges and God-willing, remember these days with pride. No matter what things are being said about me in corners while I am not there, I will not turn from this part of my life and if I fall, it will be without regrets.

DUES JUVAT
God assists